Richard’s Blog

The Youngster is now legal. She’s reached the ripe old age of 21. Now she can buy her own drinks. Of course she’s young and pretty so I doubt that that’s ever been a problem.
–Guys are dumb and drunk guys make the average jellyfish look like Einstein.

In honor of her birthday she bought us lunch…. And here I was planning on buying something like Olive Garden or Las Islitas. Oh well, it works for me.

The craziest Cuban called and wanted some stuff printed off the internet. She said she didn’t want to get in trouble by printing it from there. I told her that because of the site they wanted to go to she could go ahead and do it…. Then I found out that they had already tried and couldn’t for some unknown reason…. Didn’t want to get in trouble huh? Ok lady. I’ll remember that.

Someone overheard her talking to me and I guess they looked surprised. You’d think that everyone around here would be used to her talking dirty. —Being shy I find it quite embarrassing but what can I do? I wouldn’t want to mention it to anyone, it might get her fired for sexual harassment. All I can do is listen to her and try not to let anyone see me blushing.

TPFKAP = The Person Formerly Known as Prego

The Youngster = The latest vertically challenged addition to our disorganization.
—-She turns 21 on the 14th of this month.

Do Not let Panchito near anything that can make a mess.
If it can break he will break it. If it can spill he will spill it. And at no time will it occur to him to stop what he’s doing and clean it up. –Ok never mind the “stop what he’s doing” part, it just won’t occur to him to clean it up unless you tell him to.

He went out to paint over some graffiti and in the process left a trail of paint everywhere he went.
He spilled a cup or so in the back where he poured the paint, left a trail of drops through the store and then he spilled at least a pint by the backdoor.

When he spilled the paint by the backdoor he told -not asked- but told the Youngster to clean it up. Fortunately for him she thought he was joking.

We need to find a way to get him to work? with Flower for about a week. –That’ll cure him of thinking he can give orders.
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TPFKAP has a new puppy. This one’s a little furry critter that might get all the way up to 10 pounds.
Hmmmmm… Five kids and a 3 pound puppy. I hope the critter’s fast.

I don’t remember what kind he is, but Big-D’s S.O. said that he’s some kind of designer dog.

We used to call those mixed breed dogs mutts and give them away. Now they give them fancy names and charge a large fortune for the yappy little pests.

She hasn’t got a name for him yet, but I suggested Cat-Food.

Yesterday I was feeling fat… OK so I wasn’t “feeling fat” I was, am, and will be fat for some time yet. I’m up 3 kilos in less that a month… So, without asking, the Youngster brought me a ham, egg and cheese bagel from Winchell’s.

You know how hard it is to lose weight, and here someone brings me food out of the goodness of her heart. I couldn’t very well refuse, that would have hurt her feelings and I wouldn’t ever want to do a thing like that. —-But it’s still her fault that I’m having so much trouble sticking to my diet.
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TPFKAP was complaining about the gray trash can and how she’d asked Panchito to empty it and he hadn’t because he never does anything she tells him to do. Well she was wrong. He did it last night when he took out the rest of the trash.

How could she possibly accuse a hard working, attentive, observant, self starter like Panchito of not doing whatever was necessary to make sure that every aspect of his job was done and done properly.
He is well known for doing anything that needs doing around here without having to be asked.
I think I can safely say that his reputation speaks for itself.
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I’m trying to get one of Paula’s cousins to come into the store and meet the Youngster.
He’s good looking, in his early twenties, he has his own place, his own car, a steady job and he likes Bob Dylan. He’s not a morning person and he doesn’t smile a lot, especially before noon. —He’s sort of a male version of her, except he’s not afraid of his own shadow. Oh yeah, he can cook and not just BBQ.

What’s wrong with him you ask? Well he’s a little flinchy. His last steady got in to drugs and when she got caught she tried to frame him. —A couple of nights in jail for a crime you knew nothing about would make anyone flinchy. It’s only been a little over a week so he’s still at the “I’m never going to trust another woman for as long as I live” stage. —She’d have to put up with some minor insecurities for a while but I think they’d make a cute couple.

Now all I have to do is get chicken little to quit hiding under his bed every time he hears a woman’s voice and come down to meet her.

She’s about to turn 21 so maybe I can get them both to show up for Latin Night at Sunrise Ranch.

Panchito is going to be covering Monster Rat’s shift while she’s on vacation.
Which means… Wait for it….. He’ll have to talk to customers….. Bwahahahaha
Ok, I know. I shouldn’t pick on him.. but…. Yes I should… Bwahahahaha

This should be funny. He not only has to speak up and talk to customers, he gets to work with his mother…. Bwahahahahaha –Sorry, I just can’t help myself.

I didn’t bring lunch today and now I’m wondering what we’re going to eat.
Hmmmmm, Mr B just told me he’s coming by.. Maybe TPFKAP can talk him into buying us Olive Garden, it’s not very likely but as long ask we’re asking we might as well shoot high.

The Youngster and The Person Formerly Known As Prego (TPFKAP) both wore their hair in ponytails so I decided that today was Ponytail Day and tried to pull my hair back in to the requisite “do”……… Ah well. Such is life.

Not too many centuries back, in spite of my current hairline, I wore my hair in a ponytail. I looked like one of those old Hippies turned computer consultant you used to see all the time. –It looks really Dorky and NO I won’t post any pictures.
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I found out today that Winchell’s has breakfast sandwiches. They have things ham and eggs, sort of like McDonald’s, but served on a bagel. —I’d rather have doughnuts
Nobody asked me if I wanted anything… I feel so rejected…. Sob, sniffle.
Do you think my always saying no when they ask about breakfast might have something to do with it?… Nah, they just don’t love me. I know they don’t… nobody loves me.. Sob, sniffle.
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Panchito finally finished summer school and got his diploma… About time.

Now we need to find him a Girlfriend. She needs to be reasonably pretty and patient enough to train him out of all the weird habits he has. Like suddenly spacing, or talking to the computer while people are watching….. Hmmmm. Who do you know in his age bracket who is up for a major challenge?
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We’re giving out “bags” - they’re really envelopes, but I won’t tell anybody if you don’t tell anybody - for scrap gold so hopefully people in the neighborhood will bring us their broken necklaces and such.
I think paying more would bring them in faster, or maybe we’re already maxed on what we can afford to pay. Who knows? Nobody tells me anything and I’m much happier that way.
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No, I’m not bored outta my everlovin’ skull and I’m certainly not stalling instead of doing what I’m supposed to be doing.
How could you even think such a thing? I’m hurt! –I don’t deny it mind you… But I’m hurt!

Yeah, yeah, I know. Shutup and get back to work.

You know you have a hangover when:

1. You’re convinced that chirping birds are Satan’s pets.
2. Trying to gain control of the situation, you continue to tell your room to “stay still.”
3. Looking at yourself in the mirror induces the same reaction as chugging a glass of fresh paint.
4. You’d rather have a pencil jammed up your nose than be exposed to sunlight.
5. You set aside an entire morning to spend some quality time with your toilet.
6. You replace the traditional praying on your knees with the more feasible praying in a fetal position.
7. The bathroom reminds you of a carnival barker shouting, “Step right up and give it whirl!”
8. All day long your motto is, “Never again.”
9. You could purchase a new bike just by recycling the bottles around your bed.
10. Your natural response to “Good morning,” is “Shut up!”

I know business is slow, not just us but pretty much everywhere, but our share of the customers that are out there are idiots.

I watch people who have been here multiple times before standing in front of the doors, listening to the buzz and waiting for them to automatically open…. Man, you want to talk about technologically impaired.

I hate Hispanic radio. It sounds just like English radio, but I actually have to listen to it to figure out what sort of stupidity they’re spouting this time. Once I get past the language barrier they sound exactly alike. Right down to laughing at things that are just plain dorky and proving that they only have 6 cds in their entire collection. So we can listen to the same dozen songs over and over and over again.

—Do you like that? I used Hispanic and English instead of Mexican and American. I’m now officially politically correct…. hurray for me.

Although the word English implies the the part of Great Britain known as England, so to be totally correct perhaps I should have used the term American English. But then what about Hispanic? Shouldn’t I be more specific about the origin of the particular variety of Spanish being spoken?

After careful consideration I think I’ll use the terms Mexican Spanish and American English or Mexican and American for short…. Hmmm, It looks like I was politically correct all along.
—Politically correct…. now there’s a contradiction in terms.

Hi Sara.
Sorry I couldn’t make it to your party, but I was busy dealing with a full blown hissie fit being thrown by my soon to be ex-girlfriend.
(very soon if that stupid psycho-bitch doesn’t tell me what the fuck set her off.)

I’m still not sure why she’s so effin’ pissed at me.
But among her many complaints seems to be that she doesn’t want me going out drinking with other women?? (I invited her to come along… She said she didn’t want to.) and the fact that I won’t do exactly as I’m told. Huh?? —She’s known me how many years? And now she’s surprised to find out that I’m set in my ways and maybe a little stubborn??
I probably missed some important points in our discussion, but I was yelling too loud to hear her.

— I gotta start hanging out with normal people. —

Anyway, Happy Birthday.

“Hi. I’m gonna be late. What would you like from McDonald’s? …..Sigh.. Some things will never change. It’s just as well. If they don’t eat they get cranky.

I’m on a diet so everyone is discussing what to have for lunch…. Ef it. We’re having Olive Garden. —Yeah I’m buying.

Customers. Bunches of them. All at once….. Then they leave…. Ah well.

I’m trying to think of a way to get us on the first page of Google for just “title loan” or “title loan +Nevada” and my head hurts. —I hate it when they expect me to think. —Well. I did say trying. I don’t get paid enough to actually think.

Speaking of getting paid too much. An IT guy for a major city has locked them out of the system.
No payroll, no personnel files, no hiring, no firing. They won’t say why he’s so pissed but he’s in jail and has only given them bogus passwords.

He also seems to have put something in the system keep people updated about his situation.

He was making about $150k a year and may be upset about bad performance ratings. I don’t know what he has in mind, but I think he can kiss his $150k a year and pension goodbye.
–Sounds like a Mikey kind of logic.

Hmmmm. Yep, Monster Rat just mopped the pad on the floor behind the counter and now she’s fanning it with a towel.
I wonder if she’s trying to dry it or if she thought the poor thing was too hot and is trying to cool it off?

The youngster just left with Panchito to get the food. —If anyone calls for her I think we should tell them she left with Frank and we haven’t seen either of them since…. It wouldn’t be a lie.

Four more Excedrin and back to work.